dead or alive?

Oh how i long to be granted a sympathetic kiss
from an angel with the wings of perfection.
This silent pain rots inside me like a plagued
maelstrom.

I look at these pills that have been turned
into ashes by the remorseless sun. So what
am i to do when the noose gets tighter as I hang
in the desolate wishing well.

My thoughts become thorns seeping deeper until
I bleed the temperature of zero. I wish i could
just let the blood of mine escape into a whirlwind
that leads to an eternal peace, for this would heal
my heart permanently.

If i were to let my heart thaw out for a few years
I don't think this would melt the frost that has
been installed in me. Every time i sob my tears turn
to icicles and I scream as they seep back inside my skin.